Writing Update

In December, I finished writing a novel called Perfect Circumstances, with themes of OCD, choosing motherhood, and AI. After I sent it to a few beta readers, edited, and revised, I began querying agents.

To date I’ve sent out 80 queries and  received 20 formal rejections. Several of these rejections came with positive comments and kind words, while others were generic responses. General consensus: love the idea and your writing, but it’s not right for my list.

I should be used to rejections by now, between my last manuscript and this one, I’ve received a lot of them. But I’m not. Each one offends me and creates a needle-sized hole in my confidence as a writer. Some hurt more than others, ones from agents that I’ve dreamed to represent me but that’s the way this thing goes.

Write. Revise. Query. Get Rejected. Repeat.

I just have to believe that every no is a step closer to the yes I’ve been working toward.

What I’m Reading

I haven’t been reading as much as I want to. I write in the morning and by the time I get into bed at night and try to read, I’m too tired to focus. Of the books I’ve been able to finish, I’d recommend these:

• Zelda: A Biography by Nancy Milford
• Women in White Coats: How the First Women Doctors Changed the World of Medicine by Olivia Campbell
• Goodbye, Vitamin by Rachel Khong

Next, I’ll be tackling the 800 page  mammoth, The Second Sex by Simone de Beauvoir.

On my Mind

In just over a week, I turn thirty-seven and I’m feeling a huge shift (mid-life crisis?). There’s this fire in my chest and for once it isn’t anxiety. It’s the realization that time is passing, whether I want it to or not. It’s like that Hilary Duff song:

There’s some greyish highlights

Reminding me that nobody runs faster than time

It’s heartbreaking and reassuring

This heartbreak and reassurance is  calling me to reinvent myself before it’s too late. To add more colour to my wardrobe, dye my hair (for fun), paint my nails, create boundaries, and stick up for myself.

It’s the call to be loud and take up space.

It’s also a call to slow down, to put my phone in the other room, to read more, to go to the library, to go to the store instead of ordering, to make phone calls instead of texting, and to get off of social media.

It’s a call to get back to myself.

xo Vanessa